BREAKING: Michigan Wolverines head coach Sherrone Moore has stunned the football world by suspending three of the team’s star players after they were caught partying at a downtown nightclub on Monday night — just hours after missing team practice earlier that day, citing “health reasons.” According to sources within the Michigan Wolverines organization, the decision came immediately after Sherrone Moore reviewed video footage and confirmed multiple reports verifying the players’ presence at the club. “If you think skipping practice and lying about it makes you a Michigan Wolverine, think again — not on my field, not under my watch,” Michigan Wolverines declared firmly.