BREAKING: Green Bay Packers head coach Matt LaFleur has stunned the football world by suspending three of the team’s star players — Jordan Love, Josh Jacobs, and Xavier McKinney — after they were caught partying at a downtown nightclub on Monday night, just hours after missing team practice earlier that day, citing “health reasons.” According to sources within the Green Bay Packers organization, the decision came immediately after Matt LaFleur reviewed video footage and confirmed multiple reports verifying the players’ presence at the club. “If you think skipping practice and lying about it makes you a Green Bay Packer, think again — not on my field, not under my watch,” the Green Bay Packers declared firmly.